Friday, December 19, 2003

while trying to kill my time, aku gi ayun nyer web, then to fer's blog, then i found this:

My inner child is six years old today

My inner child is six years old!


Look what I can do! I can walk, I can run, I can
read! I like to do stuff, and there's a whole
big world out there to do it in. Just so long
as I can take my blankie and my Mommy and my
three best friends with me, of course.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

giler.... i bet being a 6 years old must be fun. takyah risau apa2.. aku ni .. in 2 weeks time will be sweet 24... ehehehe.. bolehla.... kasi can la... masih sweet....

bilik baru....

aku dpt bilik baru kat rumah. malam semalam, dgn secara ditactor nyer, aku dan adik aku telah merampas bilik tidur adik lelaki kami untuk dijadikan bilik kami.... kah kah kah (ketawa kejam). nasib la kan... sapa suruh dia jadi anak bongsu.... tapi apa nak risau, nanti rumah tu, jatuh ke tgn dia gak... dahla aku dpt tanah di kampung sebelah yg lagi jauh dari bandar. tension tul. kalau dpt tanah balakang rumah aku skrg pun dah ok sgt dah. boleh buat rumah banglo satu.
skrg ni nak beli rumah bukannyer murah, lagi2 kalau kat kwsn lembah klang. alang2 baik aku beli kat hartamas jer kan... lagi power.

Friday, December 12, 2003

finally, berjaya jugak aku buat some improvements...
nasib baik aku nyer free time mmg byk giler... adala masa to do my own thing.

esok boss aku buat rumah terbuka. aku kena dtg and layan the clients.. scary gak tu. camner la aku nak converse ngan aku nyer clients yg for sure umur at least 5 years older. kalau nak ckp pasal lagu2 hip hop retila aku.

but then, this is not bussiness oriented event. so, no need to worry la...

i find this site very interesting... ni rush nyer site.. tapi dia tak update pun.. anyways, take a look if u want- my potential.



Thursday, December 11, 2003

dah nak balik... yey... esok dah jumaat.

aku dpt ni dari member aku.. since aku rasa joke ni kelakar nak mampus.... aku terpaksala post kat blog ni gak. for those who don't know, kancil nyer max speed 160 km/hr

Subject: PERODUA Boleh!!



pada suatu malam yang hening dan sunyi di lebuhraya utara selatan
kelihatan sebuah kancil putih tersadai di sebelah lane kerosakan.Ada
orang tua yang berdiri disebelahnya,pemilik kancil tu sedang berjalan
kehulu kehilir cuba menahan kereta supaya membantu.tidak ada sebuah
kereta pun berhenti.tiba-tiba datangla sebuah kereta evo 7 berhenti di
sebelah kancil tadi.

"ada apa nie pakcik,kereta rosak ke?"tanya pemuda berusia dalam
lingkungan 20an."a'ha rosak "jawap pakcik tu simple aje....
"ok,cam nie,saya ada tali nanti saya ikat kat kereta saya dan saya tarik
kereta pakcik sampai tol"mamat nie bagi idea.
"worrait gak tu...",tapi....nanti kalau pakcik rasa awak bawak laju
pakcik
akan hon dan bagi high beam"

"ok pakcik"..mamat nie pun ikatlah tali kat kereta kancil didepan dan
hujungnya diikat dibelakang bumper evonye.
dia pun jalanla..dengan slow dan berhati-hati.Dalam lima kilometer mamat
nie laju le sikit,apalagi pakcik tu pun hon dan bagi high beam la kat
mamat
tu.Mamat tu pun slowkan balik..

Tiba-tiba ada sebuah ferrari datang dari belakang dan press minyak kat
mamat evo7.apa lagi,jiwa muda patang dicabar,
dia pun tekan la minyak rapat nak kejar ferrari nie...lupa la pulak dia
dengan kancil org tua yg diikat kat belakang kereta dia.

Orang tua tu punya la hangin satu badan,dia pun hon dan bagi hi beam
bagai nak rak.Mamat evo7 tu dah tak sedar dah angin punya
pasal.Kebetulan pilak polis ada buat speed trap kat bawah jambatan.

Vrooommm......bedesup peginye...

ini dah lebih speed limit nie...kate polis nie..cecah 250kmj memasing
nie...

dia pun contact la kengkawan dia kat depan supaya saman kereta-kereta
yg laju nie...

"over..over,ada tiga buah kenderaan memandu melebihi had laju,sebuah
ferrari,sebuah evo7 dan sebuah lagi kalau aku cakap korang mesti tak
percaye punye.........sebuah kancil putih tengah cucuk angin evo7 tu
dan bagi hon dan hi beam nak potong!!!'

-end-

Wednesday, December 10, 2003

i always thought that girls jer yg suka bergossip and all... but bila aku kat US, aku rasa salah assumption aku tu. actually the guys when they get together pun suka bergossip. cuma lain sikit caranyer...

the best thing about gossiping with my girl friends is the gigling, screaming and guffaw part.... sometimes takla kelakar sgt pun. cuma bila dah ramai2 mmg lupa diri langsung.... i can still remember how elly and I gossip... mmg tak ingat dunia la... boleh bukak tingkap besar2 pulak tu.. i don't know how many people can hear it. eheheh... masa sophomore year, aku, elly, bie and haz normally buat girl's nite out kat bilik bie (sbb bilik aku not presentable, bilik elly kecik sgt, bilik haz takder tv). we gossip and gossip till morning... pastu main game entah apa2 ntah. kinda miss those times...

tapi bila gossip ngan budak2 lelaki... diorg suka make fun of other people. ckp benda bukan2 la... the gossip yg aku suka nak dgr but sometimes terlalu "lucah" (to hear it from a guy). nevertheless, aku tak kisah sgt pun... asalkan boleh gelak2.. makes my mundane life more ceria...

skrg ni... nak gossip ngan sapala agaknyer.... almost everyone yg aku kenal dah ada life sendiri... kalau diorg takder life pun, aku yg dah susah nak keluar dari rumah sbb duduk ngan parents. i just don't understand how thery don't mind me staying at the state, but susah sgt nak lepaskan aku gi jalan2 kat malaysia ni...

Monday, December 08, 2003

UNFOLDING THE ROSE:

A young, new ustaz was walking with an older, more seasoned ustaz in the garden one day. The younger ustaz wanted to marry a noble Muslim girl but was unsure whether their relationship would stand the test of time and temptation. Though he believes his fiancé loves him dearly, he was still afraid of the unknown. Feeling a bit insecure about what Allah had him do, he asked the older ustaz for some advice. The older ustaz walked up to a rosebush and handed the young ustaz a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing off any petals. The young ustaz looked in disbelief at the older ustaz and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the will of Allah for his life and ministry.


But because of his great respect for the older ustaz, he proceeded to try to unfold the rose, while keeping every petal intact... It wasn't long before he realized how impossible this was to do. Noticing the younger ustaz's inability to unfold the rosebud without tearing it, the older ustaz began to recite the following poem...

It is only a tiny rosebud,
A flower of Allah's design,
But I cannot unfold the petals
With these clumsy hands of mine.
The secret of unfolding flowers
Is not known to such as I.
ALLAH opens this flower so sweetly,
Then in my hands they die.
If I cannot unfold a rosebud,
This flower of Allah's design,
Then how can I have the wisdom
To unfold this life of mine?
So I'll trust in Allah for leading
Each moment of my day.
I will look to Allah for His guidance
Each step of the way.
The pathway that lies before me,
Only Allah knows.
I'll trust Him to unfold the moments,
Just as He unfolds the rose.
last saturday nite, aku+matde gi rumah hafiz. actually nak gi masa siang, tapi matde byk hal la pulak, hantar abah gi airportla, gi main bola la... so, terpaksala gi malam. sian hafiz. dah terngantuk2 dia. aku tak prasan dia dah ngantuk sbb aku dah biasa sgt lepak ngan dia sampai mlm2 buta. tak terpkla dia boleh ngantuk awal2 gitu. best giler dpt gambar masa grad.nasib baik aku gi grad ceremonies ngan hafiz... adala hard copy nyer gambar.

aku rasa kurang praktikal guna digital camera kat malaysia ni.. nak cuci mmg mahal nak mampus. satu keping RM1. and kena processing fee RM1.50 every time... very2 expensive.. so, i'm decided to buy a new camera yg bukan digital. raya ni family aku langsung tak amik gambar pun.

aku ada baca satu buku citer malam semalam... aku nampak satu trend dalam buku cerita and drama melayu lately nih.. selalunyer mesti hero or heroin baru balik blaja oversea.. most of the times US. then bercinta sesama sepupu. aku pun pelik. bukan berkawin sama sepupu ni kurang elok ke sbb ada pertalian sedara. lastly, kalau ada anak mesti satu jer. jrg jer aku dgr org melayu yg tinggal kat kampung cuma ada 1 anak. apala diorg yg tulis buku/drama ni... cubala jadi adventurous sikit...

Thursday, December 04, 2003

dalam byk2 hari, aku suka hari jumaat, sbb the day after that dah sabtu... tak keje. but then bila masuk ahad, dah menyampah dah sbb the day after dah hari isnin. weekend ni as usual, aku nak lepak rumah rush. boleh tido the whole day. kalau kat rumah, trasa guilty tido jer sbb nanti semua benda mak aku kena buat. so, terpaksala meringankan sikit tulang.

plus, astro nyer program tak interesting sgt during weekends.. i prefer the shows during weekdays.

Tuesday, December 02, 2003

i've started reading new kind of books... non-fiction one. just to widen my perspective. iyerla... asyik nak baca romance books jer.. nanti aku gak yg depress sbb my romance life is very far from romantic, more like a roller-coaster actually. anyways, one book entitled problem from hell. that book was recommended by matde and it was really good. it explains how the un-involvement of US had led to genocide. but sometimes bila diorg masuk campur and they screw-up, then diorg lak yg kena.. what to do... that's the price of being the sole-superpower. everything diorg kena amik tau and handle.

right now, i'm reading about globalization. aku baca terlalu la slow nyer.. baru masuk second chapter... maybe i should have read the book before i was interviewed by petronas. so i can put in more brilliant ideas... and takla kena hentam teruk2 ngan interviewer. bukan rezeki aku kot.

it would be nice to know everything in this world. i'm so tired of being ridicule.. it was mainly my fault actually to finding out about stuff. i just mind my own business when i was at the state. maybe if i read more papers... yeah... maybe.

i'm thinking of nak bukak my own bussiness one day. taknakla makan gaji forever. duit tak byk pun. aku ingat nak blaja2 buat kek secara kecil2an... ok gak kan?

Friday, November 28, 2003

after beraya kat us for 4 years, beraya kat rumah mmg trasa sgt best.. even though takder org sgt. makcik2 and pakcik2 yg duduk sebelah rumah semua balik kampung. maklumla, diorg masih ada mak/bapak mentua lagi. then kakak2 aku yg ada anak2 semua balik kampung gak... sunyi giler rasanyer... tinggalla aku dan adik2 dan mak + abah jer.

kitorg tak beraya ngan abah+mak sbb abah aku anak yg paling tua and nenek+atuk aku dah takder. so, adik2 abah aku yg dtg ke rumah. kalau ikut abah beraya mmg tak beraya la gamaknyer.. mak pun anak ke-4, jadi dia pun tak beraya sgt. diorg bila raya pertama sampai ketiga mmg tak gi mana2. skrg baru start... pegila ke rumah wak2 and bibik2 diorg yg masih ada.

aku lak, dah start keje dah skrg ni. demam lak tuh... skrg musim buah. rambutan mmg tak terkata la byk nyer.. and aku pun sedap jer makan sampai sakit tekak..

maybe by next week bila matde dah balik ke putrajaya, aku start gi rumah budak2 us yg lain...

Friday, November 21, 2003

since esok aku dah start cuti, aku nak mengucapkan....

SELAMAT HARI.... MAAF ZAHIR BATIN....semua...

bagi elly, hafiz, apu and hakam... since aku spend most of my times with you guys before aku balik... aku nak mintak ampun byk2 kalau aku ada buat silap esp. waktu2 aku PMS, sorryla.. time tu emo sikit... halalkan makan minum... kalau nak halalkan hutang2 aku (if any) pun ok gak... thanks for the good times...

to the rest all my friends yg baca blog ni.. aku mintak maaf kalau ada apa siliap... manala tau apa yg aku tulis kdg2 tu menyinggung hati sapa2 ker...

already... take care u all... tata...


Friday, November 14, 2003

is it ok if....
can i....
what if....

there's a lot that i want to write. but my mind is so numb and i'm not good with words either.. normally, when facing a situation that i don't know how to handle, i just stop thinking about it and let it be... but will i be able to do it?

to all malaysian students in umich especially elly, i hope u guys will stay strong... take care... hope to see you guys in malaysia.

Monday, November 10, 2003

hari raya... masa b4 masuk u, hari raya means i'll get at least one new baju raya & some duit raya; masa kat u, it means a lot of open houses to attend + don't have to cook for at least a few days; now, hari raya means endless shopping for family's brg2 raya+ mencuci rumah... yeah.. i have to basuh my house sbb dah byk sgt habuk accumulated.... and we do it only before raya. masa ni la nak bersihkan segala2nyer... my only adik perempuan pulak tgh amik spm, and my mom takyah tolong coz she's the only one who cooks. abah aku la kesian.... asyik kena bersihkan lumpur jer... kat rumah aku dah banjir 2 kali dah since puasa ni... kalau banjir lagi masa raya kang.. i don't know leee

tukar topic sat... hitz fm nyer issue this morning... heart or money.. kinda interesting issue... i think i have to go for the money... eheheh... mcm2 aku boleh beli kalau aku ada duit. keter pun takla takat kelisa jer.. i can go for peugeot 206 terus... then i can buy lots and lots of diamonds... buy a resort style condominium at hartamas... built my own swimming pool.... get a personal trainer... shops for furniture at IKEA...since i know wishing doesn't make it so, i just better stop now.

Friday, November 07, 2003

Thursday, November 06, 2003

skrg ni tgh rehat. today tak perlu beli apa2.. so, takyah keluar. bestnyer kalau ada keter baru.. sure engin pun senyap jer.. takderla mcm kereta aku yg setiap kali tekan minyak sure bunyik... pastu absorber pun bunyik gak...terciut ciut... ish... tak bersyukur betul aku ni... bukannyer kena bayar apa2 pun utk keter tu... bayar duit minyak jer...
tapi yg bestnyer... keter kancil ni.. 20 ringgit dah penuh dah tangki... pastu ulang alik gi keje... adala 5 ringgit. so.. kalau utk gi kerja jer tanpa singgah mana2... duit minyak cuma dlm 50 la seminggu..

bob... di mana anda? saja jer.. nak tau... sbb dah lama tak dgr brita... matde pun dah terindu2 ni...ehehehe

Monday, November 03, 2003

The Difference between Men and Women

Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

Then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says aloud, "Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?"

There is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: Geez, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.

And Roger is thinking: Gosh. Six months.

And Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward... I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person? And Roger is thinking: So that means it was... let's see... February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means... lemme check the odometer... Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.

And Elaine is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed--even before I sensed it--that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected. And Roger is thinking: And I'm gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600! And Elaine is thinking: He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. God, I feel so guilty putting him through this, but I can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure.

And Roger is thinking: They'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty. That's exactly what they're gonna say, the scumballs. And Elaine is thinking: Maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems truly to care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.

And Roger is thinking:Warranty? They want a warranty? I can't believe it! "Roger," Elaine says aloud. "What?" says Roger, startled. "Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have... Oh, God, I feel so..." (She breaks down, sobbing.) "What?" says Roger. "I'm such a fool," Elaine sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse." "There's no horse?" says Roger. "You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Elaine says. "No!" says Roger, glad finally to know the correct answer. "It's just that... It's that I... I need some time," Elaine says. (There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.) "Yes," he says. (Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.) "Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?" she says. "What way?" says Roger. "That way about time," says Elaine. "Oh," says Roger. "Yes." (Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.) "Thank you, Roger," she says. "Thank you," says Roger.

Then he takes her home. She lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it. (This is also Roger's policy regarding world hunger.) The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions but never getting bored with it, either.

Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say: "Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?"
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

i've read it somewhere... tapi maybe masa tu aku budak2 lagi and i did not realize that it is actually true. sometimes girls tends to think more about relationship (psl2 yg tak perlu la).... sbb dulu masa ramai kawan perempuan.. selalu gak borak2 pasal boyfriend masing2 esp in high school, i know it is stupid... mcmla yg lelaki tu pk pasal kita pun.... so, girls out there... stop thinking too much about your relationship or boyfriend... and just do whatever you want with your life... if the guy truly loves you... he'll accept you no matter what... but if he doesn't... i'm sorry... live goes on i suppose.

Thursday, October 23, 2003

it's thursday, and as usual... malam tadi, aku tido awal...that means, miss 3 episodes of CSI Miami three weeks in a row... see.. how malaysia has changed my life, kalau kat us, mimpi la aku nak tgk citer2 camtu... sure aku tgk comedies jer.. i really miss that 70's show and friends... isk.. isk...

since aku tido awal... aku pun bangun awal... 3.38 pagi... then mengelamun... pastu ntah camner, aku terpk pasal anak2 yg kena halau dari rumah... aku rasa mak bapak tak patut halau anak diorg walau sebesar manala diorg nyer salah. kalau budak tu yg tak pandai... kalau yg pompuan... bsr kemungkinan jadi bohsia... kalau yg laki...mungkin jadi pencuri... apasal la nak musnahkan idup anak yg dah musnah... sedangkan nabi ampunkan umat.

ada gak kes, budak tu pandai, tak pernah mintak duit kat mak bapak, tiba2 termengandung... dah.. kena buang keluarga, sian budak tu. kenapala kdg2 parents ni penting kan diri sendiri.. pkla sikit... mcmla diorg ni tak pernah muda.. paham2la kan.. maafkanla dia... suruhla dia balik.

bila dah penat pk, aku call matde and tido balik.....

Sunday, October 19, 2003

as of today, i really believe that being a guy has more advantages than being a girl. if i am a guy, i would have the chance to go to sites (boss aku tak caya aku boleh pegi coz i'm a small girl)... tak larat angkat pipe nanti... well.. whatever, a guy don't need permission to go anywhere... boleh tido at friends house without questions.... boleh balik malam, travel jauh... boleh buat apa2 pun... ni aku nak gi swimming pun semua org byk soal.. tension tau tak. aku mmg trasa sungguh tak puas hati with this dammed double standards. i use to remind myself that double standards kat malaysia still very strong, tapi bila sendiri yg terkena... mmg pedas giler.. to hell with them..

ok, tukar citer sikit....
lately byk giler citer2 pasal ibu2 yg ditinggalkan oleh anak. ibu2 jer yg dpt masuk tv sbb selalunyer pompuan yg nampak lagi frail (double standard) and live longer than men. member aku berpendapat, mesti ibu2 ni ibu2 yg jahat kat anak2. well, i never see it that way. i use to believe that it must be the child's fault when they abadon their mothers. if you really thinks about it, sometimes that's true. maybe mak dia mistreated the child.. that the child later on heated the mother so much that they leave her. i just hope when the times come i won't leave my mother...

Monday, October 13, 2003

semalam tgk citer down with love... cool giler citer tu... suka tgk renee tu berjalan.. lenggang tak ingat nyer... ehehe.. matde yg recommend. nasib baik best. sbb selalunyer citer yg dia betul2 nak tgk mmg sucks... ada ker patut ajak aku tgk citer mami jarum junior... langsung tak lawak. dahla guna bahasa yg aku tak familiar.

anyways... i just love that movie... terpaksa tabik renee... dia punya expression mmg tak sapa boleh lawan.. and also... yesterday my first time travel dari putrajaya ke rumah. jauh sungguh. nasib baik tak sesat. terpaksa hantar matde balik ke rumah sbb dia tumpang org ke-pyramid...

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

tadi mcm ada benda nak tulis... tapi dah lupa... makin lama makin pelupa la aku agaknyer. well, nothings new... as usual, byk giler yg aku nak buat.. tapi semua takleh nak jalan sbb byk sgt halangan (ie. mak tak kasi, bapa tak kasi, keter adik aku pakai, duit tak cukup... bla bla bla). i just hate it bila jadi camtu. not that i always get what i want. normally the other way round.

but sometimes, i don't know what i want. do i want to change my job? i think in this case it is 50-50. i am a little bit lucky actually to straight away dpt keje after duit aku dah hampir abis kat bank. tmpt keje pun dekat ngan rumah... even though it takes me 40 minutes to get to work. aku bawak keter slow sikit. maklumla... tak biasa... at least aku dah boleh bawak. compared to few months ago. nak kuarkan keter dari parking spot pun tak berani.

sbnrnya, aku pun tak tau apa point aku... nak abiskan masa jer sbnrnya... have to wait for my dad. bila la agaknyer "probation" period aku ni nak abis. asyik kene tunggu org jer.

and skrg aku dah start tgk2 keter apa yg aku nak beli... keter tu mesti tak lebih dari 1.3cc, compact, 4 doors. kereta2 yg aku berkenan... kelisa, peugeot 206 and citreon C3.... tgk gaya, kelisa jer yg aku mampu beli...but i think citreon tu 1.6cc la... have to check again.