Friday, December 30, 2005

aku dah ada hobi baru... beading...

seronok lak rasa menjahit2 manik ni. bila buat tu rasa leka... bagi aku, better buat benda tu dari main game.. selalunyer bila aku bosan sgt, aku mainla game yg takyah guna otak.. susun2 objek ker... stuff like that.. tapi bila beading ni.. in the end ada gak result nyer. and i think i like glittery stuff. so, bila aku dah pandai beading krg, bole la aku kasi hadiah kat kawan2 aku nyer birthday like beaded purse, anting2 or rantai yg aku buat sendiri. the question is... kat mana aku nak beli bead2 tu?

Friday, December 16, 2005

ada tinggal about 2 more weeks before aku masuk 26 tahun... uuuuu... 26 u, sounds like i'm old... that's why i started to wear baju kecik2 skrg ni. nak lawan rasa tua tu. bila dress up like a girl. bole la rasa mcm budak2 skit. skrg ni, i think my body dah sampai ke tahap optimum and skit jer lagi masuk area tembam/gemuk. so, really watching my weight right now. gi swimming as often as i can..

ok... 2005... apa yg aku dah buat and tak buat. a couple of events have happened in 2005 that i will never forget for the rest of my life. sometimes i myself wonder how in the world i could do what i did. i guess, desperate situation calls for desperate measures. i know what i did was wrong, terribly wrong, and the path that i took will surely haunt me for years to come. is it why i'm so afraid of the dark lately? is it my conscience that prevent me from having a good night sleep? i woken up like 3-4 times every night... it is very2 tiring. normally when i had a very2 bad experience, i will try to forget it and keep it stored somewhere at the back of my head. eventually i'll forget about it. but will my guilt allow me to do it? maybe not. maybe everyone will have some dark moments that they have to deal with.

i hope next year will be a better year. and really hope my man will figure out what he wants to do with his life because i know i'm going to stay in this corporate world only for the next 8 years and a half. i don't think i can survive very long here. i don't think it is for me and i want to take care of my family for a change without worrying about money every single day....

Thursday, December 15, 2005

aku gi blog elly and tried out "which sex and the city vixen are u" and i got miranda... ermm.. sama rupanyer kita elly. and yeah... both of us share the same passion for men... we do criticize them a lot and feel that we need more freedom... more guys... more...

it's true that skrg ni aku asyik terpk pasal nak kawin jer... aku dah beli baju kawin. start jahit2 manik utk brg hantaran... if my mom knew this, she'll scream. my parents tak kasi aku beli apa2 before tarikh kawin ditetapkan... i understand why... iyerla takut2 tak jadi kawin kang.. tak ker membazir. anyhow.. tak kisah la tu. parents aku ni rupa2nyer agak tak moden rupanyer. easp my dad. he doesn't even allow matde visit me at kampung that often. and matde gladly agrees. i just hope bila matde's parents and my parents borak2, matde's won't blurted out that i picked matde up at their house almost everyweek. i just love to potray that i am such a good girl in front of my parents. hipocrite? maybe... but it is better to do so rather than leave them worried all the time.

Monday, December 05, 2005

lama dah aku tak kutuk2 matde kan? trasa rindu lak nak buat camtu... :)
we have been together for about 5 years.. i cannot remember the anniversary date. heck, i cannot even remember the exact date we got engaged. i know it was in july... late july. malas nak check calender. remembering dates is not my cup of tea. luckily my birthday is on jan 1st... otherwise, i myself might forgot about it.

i really hope he will finalise his plan soonet possible so that i can start plan our wedding. i hate this uncertainty. bukan jer org2 lain tertanya2 bila aku nak kawin. aku sendiri pun tertanya2... tau2 jerla. keja kawin ni byk planning nyer. taknakla buat cam bertunang itu hari. sampai hampir breakdown. penat giler... and baju pun tangkap muat jer.

last few days i had a conversation with one of housemates.. we talked about our laki of course... nak cakap pasal apa lagi kan? and make fun of them skit2... skit jer... tak banyak pun and kutuk2 matde as usual (it's ok honey, despite your flaws, i still loooovveeee uuu). matde asked me once what about him that i loved.. to tell the truth, there's none of it. he's persistent (if he really want something), cannot leave me alone, always membebel... and tak cool langsung (walaupun selalu buat2 cam cool) . the reason why we still together is (i think) is because we are compatible with each other (i.e aku cool vs matde tak cool)... kalau dua2 cool susah la kan... okla.... dah takder idea memuji diri sendiri...