i'm in pain... giler sakit gusi aku skrg ni. for the first time ever in my life aku gi dentist to take out my tooth. selalunyer gigi2 aku yg lain aku biar jer dia tanggal sendiri... of course la bila baru sampai tu don't know what to expect. so, nervous la jugak. then dia amik the srynge with very long needle... still ok.. sampai kali ke-4 tu aku dah start cuak. aku tgk alat2 dia... damn... semua scary... tapi still ok lagi... pastu dia amik pisau potong2 skit.. still ok sbb tak rasa apa2... then dia start la pulak tekan2 ke bwh and try cabut... gagal... bila start dia menekan ngan bersungguh buat kali ke-3 aku dah start menangis.. punya la sakit masa tu.. tangan aku naik kejang sbb dentist tak kasi angkat2 badan. aku ckpla.. camner nak tak angkat badan.. that is a reaction to a pain. adala dlm 1.5 jam aku nyer gigi kena kerja kan. 2 kali gigi pecah sbb time tarik, spanar slip and pecahkan gigi kat atas and setiap kali tu aku menjerit ngan kuat nyer... sure org kat luar gerun jer dgr

bole la pulak dentist tu ckp... sabar dik... amik nafas ngan mulut, hembus pelan2 ikut idung.. mmg sakit, saya tau.... masa tu aku rasa bangang ke apa doktor ni... tak nampak ke darah aku terpercik sampai ke tudung dia... time tu dah xleh pk dah... sakit dia kalau aku nak gambarkan is like ko ada luka.. and then ko tekan kuat2 luka tu... bila dah tak tahan sgt aku hampir2 jer nak give up tapi doktor ckp kalau stop lagi teruk krg sbb aku nyer gusi dah kena potong. so, when the pain eases a little, aku tekadkan diri.. biar sakit camner pun, aku akan tahan jer... last2 alhamdullilah, dia tarik kuat2 and aku mmg pasrah jer masa tu... and kuar gak akhirnyer gigi bungsuku bersama akar2 nyer skali...

it seems that my gigi bongsu nyer akar bercantum and bengkok ke kiri... patutla sakit. itula pengalaman aku yg paling ngeri mencabut gigi.. lepas ni xde la aku nak cabut gigi dah. aku kena 2 jahitan. jumaat baru bole bukak... arrggggghhh... seksanya rasa...

aku ada boss. aku ada keja... aku kena sara diri sendiri and give some to other people... that means i cannot lose my job. so, i need to work very hard coz i know if i cannot feed myself nobody would. at least that is how i think since i was in high school. so... it is sometimes very irritating to keep saying and explaining that i have to work... and i cannot do certain stuff at certain time because my big boss is very punctual. if he caught me coming late to the office.. then i'm dead. i am not a trader that make millions of dollars, i am just an operator... that at times have to spend some money. get it?

i'm defintitely not a good person, if i am a good person i would never do the things that i did. i'm dying inside knowing that i can't undo it. everyone has their limits... i think i'm nearing mine. i don't know what i would do. i tried to be nice... but maybe i'm naturally an evil person. so, eventually, the evil me will surface.

btw, aku tgh tgk naruto skrg ni... sgt tekun menontonnyer.. sampai harry potter pun aku tolak tepi. kena baca dari mula lagi skali la nampak gayanyer.